Everyone knows what to bring to a bachelorette party: wine, carbs and a swimsuit (a questionable combination, now that I think about it...). , But what are the not-so-standard things to bring and do that’ll take you from normal bridesmaid status to being the most bomb-ass bridesmaid that’s ever existed?  For your convenience, we’ve listed them here:

1.     Get the groom involved. WAIT. Don’t stop reading! I know this violates everything you’ve ever learned about a bachelorette weekend. These all-girl getaways are just that: all girls get away (from boys). But we’re not asking you to invite the groom, or even include him in your pre-weekend planning. Rather, involve him by encouraging him to get or do something special for his bride-to-be for her to open during her two-day shindig. For one of my friends who just got married, I conducted a secret video interview with her groom the week before her bachelorette weekend. I asked him questions about my friend, their relationship, etc. But there was a catch: In order to open a gift from one of us bridesmaids, she had to guess his answer correctly after listening to the question. She loved it. Not sure why. I guess, like, love or something?

2.     A disposable camera. You won’t regret this purchase. Cue: pictures that aren’t in danger of going into the ~cloud.~  You can then mail the best gems to the bride or make them into a collage to give to her on her wedding day. In private, of course.

3.     Healthy snacks. Note: this is not in lieu of junk food. For the first 24 hours of this extravaganza most bridesmaids will eat cookie dough, Cheetos and gummy bears like they’re preparing for hibernation. Once the reality of stepping into a bikini sets in, they will be thankful for that hummus and carrots.

4.     Bluetooth speakers. Because what’s a bachelorette weekend without a dance party? And because nothing is worse than singing along to Beyonce and actually being able to hear your own voice. Drown out those questionable notes with some powerful portable  speakers. You’ll also need a stellar playlist to go along with it. So start working on that now.

5.     Your Undivided Attention. This weekend isn’t about you. It’s not about that cute guy flirting with you at the bar, not about your boyfriend texting you from home, not about looking cool in front of the other bridesmaids, not about trying that restaurant you’ve always wanted to try or exploring the city at night after the bride’s ready to peace out and go home. Make every moment of this weekend about her and what she wants to do. Ask her how she’s excited she is about marriage, how the wedding planning is going, etc. etc. Trust me, she’ll appreciate it.

6.     Lysol wipes. Yes, you’re going to be that girl. The girl who actually cares how the place looks when you leave. When your bride is ready to GTHO and go home after a non-stop weekend of no sleep, pinot, lingerie and games, you’ll have already been awake for an hour tidying the place up, packing up her things and making sure her coffee + bagel is ready to go. If she’s anything like the type-A brides I know, she’ll be grateful for your efforts and dub you… you guessed it… Bomb Ass Bridesmaid #1.

There you have it, ladies. The 6 ways to yourlovely bride’s heart during her bachelorette weekend. Have any tips that we didn’t list here? Comment below and let us know!

1. Master the fake laugh. See that bemused bridesmaid to the right of the bride? That's me. Genuinely happy, yes, but humorously cheery? Notsomuch. You might feel awkward at first, laughing at absolutely nothing. Your patience may be waning and your bridesmaid glow may be flickering dim. But when the time comes, remember these 2 important steps: Open your mouth slightly (not too much for fear of looking like you're gargling mouthwash). And smise (but not too aggressively, causing your eyes to be reduced to slits).  And then you've got it. You're fake laughing the shit out of this photoshoot, and you're looking good while doing it.

2. Wear flats. Now is not the time to try out those new bedazzled Jimmy Choos. Ain't nobody care what your feet look like anyway, especially not if you're wearing a floor-length dress. Comfort and conformity are key. You wanna be able to dance and sing your heart out to "It's Raining Men," not be the whiny bridesmaid complaining about her blisters all day. So when it comes to shoes, Jimmy Choo-se something besides those new stilettos you've been dying to rock. 

3. Go with the flow. Between manicures, pedicures, rehearsal dinners, bachelorette festivities, bridal brunches, and oh, yeah, the actual wedding, your weekend is going to be planned to a tee. Go with it. Missed a call from your boyfriend? He'll be ok. Decide the night before the wedding that you're not ready to leave the bar when the bride is? Take a chill pill. In many cases, the bride has paid a pretty penny for you to feel special (not to mention the money you've spent to be a part of her day), so you can set aside your own stuff and just be there. Another plus: You're probably going to be pampered all weekend. I mean, you're getting manicures and taking pictures. This is about as close to the celeb life as you're going to get. Soak it up.

4. Get along with the other bridesmaids. So Jenna went to Georgia Tech and dated your best friend's ex-boyfriend and you ran into her at a frat party three years ago and "accidentally" spilled the contents of your red solo cup on her white blouse... And now here you are. Serendipitously in the same bridal party, forced pose fake laughing together for a whole weekend. It's time to put your weapons down, momentarily forget what happened (we're all adults here, right), and be best friends for 48 hours. A little kindness won't kill you. And who knows, before you know it,  you might be breakin' it down to Lil Jon together before Saturday night's over. There's very little some pinot greeg can't fix.

5. Make the bride feel loved. You were chosen. Elected. Perhaps voted on by a group of family and friends to be a part of this special day. This day happens once, and the bride wants YOU to be a part of it. Don't take that for granted. No matter how stressful the wedding day may be, take time to make her feel loved and cared for. A Starbucks grande non-fat chai tea latte with no water is always a good start.

6. It’s not about you.  Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, remember this. You're the bride's support system. Her sanity. Her mascara fixer, train straightener, bouquet fluffer and emotional fortress. This is a roller coaster of a day for any bride, and you're there to keep her stable. After all, fingers' crossed, the roles will be reversed one day, and you'll want the same thing in return.